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Journal Of Sports Medicine And Physical Fitness

Ironically, the slowest man in the world works at the DMV

Gold-medal-winning Olympic sprinter Donovan Bailey, dubbed "the fastest man in the world," was cited for speeding in his Mercedes.

Sure, but where is it when the trash needs taking out?

A doctor discovered that a device he created to relieve chronic back pain by stimulating the spinal cord could also give women orgasms.

Of course, that's until your wife catches you

A British study found that having sex three or four times a week cuts a man's risk of heart attack in half.

You have to finish yours if you want a pot brownie

Schools in the Limburg province of Belgium said they would start serving low-alcohol beer to children ages 3 to 15 as an alternative to sugary soda and fruit juice. The beer-appreciation group that instigated the plan noted that lager and ale are "good for their figure [sic] and very healthy as well."

Make them watch Providence, and guys will stop doing it altogether

The government of India announced an initiative to combat overpopulation by making TV sets cheaper, thus causing couples to have less sex.

Little-known fact: Tom Hanks is 97

A study found that Oscar-winning actors live 3.9 years longer than other people. Those who win more than one Oscar live six years longer.

The real reason Tom Cruise and Sylvester Stallone will do anything for an Oscar

Researchers studying 1,000-year-old remains learned that taller human beings have always lived longer than shorter ones. (See above item.)

Why you keep going back to that airport oyster bar

A British study found that chronic jet lag causes the brain to shrink, impairing memory.

Call us when they've perfected Viagra underwear

Japanese clothing manufacturers developed a shirt that releases vitamin C through the skin.

He celebrated with some Metamucil and a heart attack

A 101-year-old man sank a hole-in-one at a Florida country club, becoming the oldest golfer ever to do so.

Work out and make yourself a snack

The author of a new book on mosquitoes said that because the insects are attracted to the smells of lactic acid and carbon dioxide, you're more likely to get bitten when you're exercising. (They also go for guys with smelly feet.)

The only thing worse is not having any

Researchers in Ohio discovered that most paper currency is contaminated with bacteria that can cause such diseases as pneumonia and blood infections.

He can start with Leonardo da Vinci, Gina Lollobrigida and the guy who invented calzones

An Italian scientist announced that he would go ahead with plans to clone human beings.

Does this mean we can stop looking and go to sleep already?

A doctor at Pace University in New York declared is no evidence that the G-spot--a bundle of nerve tissues in a woman's privates said to increase her sexual pleasure when stimulated--actually exists.

Of course, it's really just the last 10 feet or so that count

An Australian daredevil announced plans to parachute from the edge of space, 130,000 feet above the earth's surface.

The other 58 percent are still waiting for HMO approval

A report in the New England Journal of Medicine said that 80 percent of Americans feel sick in any given month, but only 22 percent visit a doctor.

Health food: the deadly menace

Researchers from the Centers for Disease Control estimated that infected alfalfa and clover sprouts Sickened 22,000 people in the late 1990s. Because bacteria on a seed's surface can grow inside the sprout itself, washing the sprouts isn't an effective way of preventing illness.

We told you simple carbs urn fast!

After a Pennsylvania house burned down because a Pop-Tart was left unattended in a toaster, newspapers noted that the pastries have been responsible for 17 fires in the past 10 years. Experiments documented on the Internet showed that a strawberry-flavored tart left in a toaster could shoot flames as much as 1 1/2 feet high.

Next they'll tell us you don't get Slim-Fast shakes at McDonald's

The president of a "low-fat" baked-goods company went to jail after pleading guilty to misbranding products. According to the Food and Drug Administration, the company had simply purchased regular day-old pastries from a Chicago bakery and repackaged them under its "Skinny" line. While all the items were supposed to contain one or two grams of fat and 125 to 165 calories, at least one, a carob doughnut, had 23 1/2 grams of fat and 411 calories.

You're motivated to go faster when you hit a warm spot

Jenny Thompson, the only American woman swimmer to have won six Olympic gold medals, admitted that competitive swimmers commonly relieve themselves in the pool.

But the cantaloupe could go at any second

A neurobiologist at the University of Texas developed a method of carbonating fruit so that it feels "fizzy" in the mouth, although he denied rumors that the process would make bananas explode.

Herbal diet drug of the year

Doctors found that even through marijuana smokers get the munchies and consume up to 40 percent more calories--mostly in the form of alcohol, cheese and junk food--they aren't any fatter than nonusers. As a result, the docs speculated that it's possible pot raises metabolism. Or maybe the smokers have simply forgotten where the fridge is located.

Save our nation--buy MEN'S FITNESS (call 800-340-8958)

Speaking at a futurists conference, a medical researcher predicted that based on current trends, 30 years from now "100 percent of Americans will be obese."

COPYRIGHT 2002 Weider Publications
COPYRIGHT 2001 Gale Group